Monday, November 12, 2012
You will always have me...
I grew up with two very special people in my life. We would
do everything together, from going to the stores, celebrating holidays, and
going out to Six Flags in San Antonio every summer was a must. When we were
young life was way easier. No commitments and no worries. When my friend was 16
she had her first real boyfriend, who she fell deeply in love with. I remember it
was hard on her sister and me, since she would dedicate all her time to him,
and rarely pay attention to us. They were together for two years, until she got
sick which made things complicated on them, since she would spend most of her
time in the hospital. A little after she was finally home and out of the
hospital, she found out he had cheated with one of her best friends. It broke
her. I couldn't be with her every day to feel her pain but I knew how she felt
because her sister would tell me. When I did go to visit her sometimes she
didn't even want to see me! Of course, selfish me would think "what did I
do, why is she mad at me?" I guess I didn't understand how she felt since
it had never happened to me. Still, sometimes I didn’t care and managed to make
her smile, I just wanted her to see that she didn’t need him, and that she had
us: all of us. I remember seeing her in bed all day, sometimes not wanting to
talk to anyone, and with a very low appetite. She even mentioned how she would
want to sleep all day not to feel the pain, and at the same time she woke up every
morning earlier than usual to try to think of answers to her situation, not to mention all the tears she would shed daily. I would try to cheer her up, but must of the
time I failed. She would laugh at some moments, only to go back to her sadness.
I can never forget she once asked me, "why me? Sickness and cheating at the
same time. Why?" She really felt betrayed because at one point she even
blamed her sickness to be the reason for his cheating, making it all about her
fault. She never really went to the doctor to get help since she was already dealing with doctors for other reasons, but she did suffer
from depression for about 1 month, well according to the symptoms which she
went through. Eventually her good mood came back, and slowly she let go of
those feelings, after she finally decided to let him go as well. Surprisingly
enough, she told me that her father has suffered from depression for about 7 years now. On the contrary, he did get help and takes
medication as well as other medications for an anxiety disorder he recently developed.
Can we say genes are involved in depression? Going back to my friend, I have to admit seeing her in that
stage broke me and I promised to always be there for her. The same way she was
always there for me, when something similar happened to me in my adolescent
years, but that is another story...
In this video they explain to us the difference between regular feelings of sadness compared to a a clinical depressive state.
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wow, i can imagine how your friend might of felt, i too was cheated on ir 2 years! It was one of the traumatic moments in my life, it felt like as i was living a life, and i also thought like your friend, going to sleep was my way of hiding the pain and for just a moment forgetting how i felt. But thank God I was brave enough to learn from my experience and wait on the best for my life. Your friend did have depression symptoms but clinically she would not be qualified for major depression because it must be a period of 3 months or more, if it would have impaired her life for a longer period she may have been diagnosed with clinical depression. For me the topic of depression is a but controversial, because i usually fall into that stereotype that doctors just give meds for a fast and easy yet dangerous result, I happy your friend rose from this situation.
ReplyDeleteI also went thru something similar. I barely got my 1st boyfriend when i was 19 almost turning 20. Wasn't that long ago since im only 21! but i guess to me having a "boyfriend" always kinda seemed like a big deal because obviously i wasn't going to date just anyone. After countless guys who have come in and out of my life since like forever ago, finally there was one that kinda had to work a bit to get me to like him and eventually i fell i for him. well anyways things didnt work out and i was devastated and i mean devastated! I cried i for months after we broke up. I lost weight ( and thats cuz im already skinny as it is :/) i felt so stupid, and to top it all off i had soo many other things going on at the same time like school that i was never able to just say in for a couple of days and just watch sad movies and just sulk. It was very hard for me, especially when i would see him everyday.. still do -.-.. but i literally felt like i was submerged in a large body of water and i could barely keep my head out of the water to breath. It took some for me to get over it and i think i even thought about trying to talk to a professional. Never got on any antidepressants or anything, just let time pass by and help heal the whole situation. I agree with besty, i feel that anti depressive drugs should be used as a last resort compared to all of the other methods to get through
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